The Day I Almost Became A Memory.

Three years. It has been three long years since my life took a drastic twist. I got a new face, a new outlook and a new life. June 9th 2010 was the day I was nearly murdered. It is funny how many small details I can remember about that day. I can remember the song that was playing in my head and what I was wearing. (For the record, I looked darn cute. I had the perfect outfit. Still bitter about that.) 

I will spare you the super gruesome details just because they are hard to hear and I don't want to ruin anyone's wonderful Sunday. The general story is that a random stranger decided to escape prison, rob me but when I had nothing besides excellent Raspberry Lemonade Chapstick, (which he didn't want... rude) he tried killing me a couple different ways and basically hid my body in some bushes and trees. Unfortunately for him, he didn't realize it is extremely hard to kill me. Apparently I have a tough head and a lot of angels rootin' for me. That and the fact I am eerily calm in high stress situations. 

Right before I blacked out, my last thought was, "I'm going to die." I was surprisingly ok with that considering my testimony about God was not all that awesome at the time. I wasn't sure what was going to happen because I had never been close to dying before. All I knew was what I had seen on movies. Which thankfully, none of Hollywood's predictions were correct. When I woke up three hours later, Freddy did not come to get me, (which was a big relief because that movie had just come out and my roommate had only told me about it and I was quite freaked out.) I did wait for my grandpa to come get me because for all I knew, I was dead and heaven looked just like Earth. My grandpa died just one month before my attack. Looking back, it was great timing by God. I definitely believe that my Grandpa Bo was helping protect me. There is no way I could have lived without some help from higher beings. 

After chilling there on the ground, I decided that no one was coming for me and I was still alive. A couple thoughts crossed my mind just then. First: my mom's voice drifted into my head. She always said, "A mother is not supposed to bury her children!" I heaved a sigh and agreed that I probably shouldn't die just yet because my mom would be super bitter for the rest of eternity. Second: I could lay here and die BUT I really didn't want flies to come eat me before I was dead. Eww. And dying seemed like way more work than just getting up and going to the hospital. 

At this point, I had no idea I was injured. I knew I was bleeding and sexually assaulted but that was it. I could feel broken teeth too but all I could think of was, "Great. Another thing I have to pay for." I attempted to crawl back to where people were. And seeing how I have the worst luck in the world, I crawled the wrong way. So after I back tracked, and got my clothes covered in mud (still bitter,) I eventually found people to help me. More specifically, Sam, Cami and Conner. 

I knew I probably wasn't all that pretty to look at so I was extremely worried that they thought I was playing a prank on them. I explained as best I could that I was not pranking them and that I needed an ambulance. Luckily, they believed me. Conner and Cami called 911 and Sam sat with me. When the cops showed up, I told them all I knew and to call my roommates and parents. Last thing I remember was them cutting off my clothes... and you guessed it. I am still super bitter. It was my best bra and favorite shirt and jeans. 

 Hospital. My head is considerable smaller in this pic than it was when I first got there.

Doctors say I should have had brain damage. I was never supposed to see out of my right eye... or even have it for that matter. But here I am. No brain injuries. Right eye can still see. I told the doctors early on that I could see out of it but they didn't believe me for a few days. The two weeks that I was in the hospital were wonderful and awful all at the same time. The doctors and nurses were the nicest, most amazing people I have ever met. But I looked horrible and that was hard to come to terms with. 

I have never, ever been angry at Mr. Leonard. Ever. Forgiving him was never even conscience thought for me, it was just automatic. I have been sad over my physical appearance because let's be real, I hit the genetic jackpot and now that was messed up. Perhaps God needed to remind me that looks aren't everything. He also had to remind me that he is there and he knows what's happening.

My lasting injuries are mild compared to what it should have been. I have double vision when I look certain ways still and my heart is stupid now. I lost 20 pounds in the hospital but that has been gained back. I finally got functional and beautiful teeth again. It has taken three years but I finally got them. I can't even express how thankful I am to every one who helped me. All the doctors, nurses, firefighters, police, detectives, judges, lawyers, and everyone who fundraiser for me and prayed for my family and I. Even you physical therapists. Not everyone loves you and I'll admit, I didn't like walking around but it was for the best and you were really nice and I appreciate what you do.

All my missing teeth! I look like Gollum.

The phrase, "Be careful what you wish for" is a saying for a reason. My dad wanted time off work and boom! I was injured and his boss gave him the two weeks off that I was up there. It had always been my dream to change the world in some small way and boom! I did. All wishes come with a price. If I had to almost die for mine, then so be it. I don't regret any of it. If I got a do over, I would still let it happen. So much good came from it. I put a murderous drug user in prison forever so no one else can be hurt.

Through this experience, I have learned a ton of things. My faith in humanity was restored. So much of the community was concerned and helped financially. I couldn't believe how wonderful everyone was. The police and detectives (especially Detective Taylor) worked overtime to help bring me justice. I can hardly wait to see them again and show them all what I actually look like and to again thank them. I had some nurses come sit with me in my room and do paperwork just so I would have some company. They would also bring me tons of mashed potatoes and gravy because that was one of the only things I could eat with my jaw wired shut. All the doctors and surgeons I've seen have all been so compassionate and helped where they could.

I still can't believe how lucky I am. Everything in my trial seemed to fall into place. Shawn Leonard is now in prison for life with no chance of parole. My case was the very first one in Utah to have that sentencing without someone actually dying. I hope this case goes into law books and people use it for other trials. (P.S. if anyone sees it in a book, let me know. I want one.) And if you really want to know more of the gross details, you can Google 'Provo Survivor June 9th 2010. There are news clips and articles and such. If you do check it out, make sure to find the one with my Chapstick quote. It is my favorite.  My mom and I changed the law about criminals getting tested for HIV before they are sentenced instead of after so the victims don't have to take nasty and expensive HIV pills. We are currently also trying to change the law about people being sentenced to prison for life without parole for attempted murder so that the 'almost dead' don't have to be afraid of the perp getting out and trying to do them in again.

I did not write this post because I want sympathy because I hate it when people tell me they are sorry for what happen. I'm not. Crap happens! Hard times shape  you as an individual. Who doesn't want character? You have to be beautiful on the inside and then the outside. Our test in life is to see how positively we respond to negative experiences. I'm not saying you can't cry once in a while. Just don't dwell on the bad parts. Try to find the silver linings or figure out what lessons that you could learn. I know from personal experience that you heal a whole lot faster if you are positive.

 

Nearly back to normal :)

Love, Mika.