Society’s Brains Are Not Connected With Their Mouths.

Recently I have picked up a babysitting gig for a friend of mine. I come over a few times a week and make sure the house doesn’t burn down and her child sleeps while she runs errands. This has given me roughly four hours every week to sit and do absolutely nothing. (Pinterest and a limited amount of data only get you so far.) I have decided to start blogging again for these hours!

Today’s topic that I have chosen is a little touchy for me. Lately I have been seeing the word “rape” being used in ‘comical’ situations. You have all seen this picture:

 

 

And possibly seen comments on YouTube saying, “I just raped the like button because I love this video so much,” or similar sentences saying they ‘raped’ the like button because they pushed it so many times. Or people commenting that they just ‘raped a burrito because it was so delicious.’

What? WHAT.

First off, how does this even make sense? You love something so much that you are going to assault it in one of the most personal ways you can? That doesn’t sound super offensive at all! (Note the extreme sarcasm people.) This makes you sound like an inconsiderate and pathetic pig who doesn’t give a damn about anyone’s feelings. If you love something/someone, you should protect and respect them, not use force to have them comply to your selfish needs.

My blog partner, Kaeli, told me to put something in here about people who say, “Oh they are so (insert term here.) They deserve to be raped.” Um EXCUSE ME. I don’t care how terrible or scantily clothed or mean and disgusting or unintelligent they are (according to anyone else's perception), why would you ever, ever, EVER, wish that upon someone? If I ever catch someone saying this, they better be prepared on getting the biggest and darkest black eye that has ever occurred in their life. This is unacceptable. She has caught a couple people who have said this and she was so mad that she couldn’t even begin to express it. She's had to defend people she shouldn't have had to defend, because no one "deserves it." I’m shocked at what some people consider appropriate to say. The fact is, no one deserves to be raped. Let me just say that one more time. In case you missed it! No one deserves it. Understood?

Rape is not funny. It is not a joke. It is not something to be discussed lightly. It is a serious and disgusting crime that happens to 1 out of 6 women, 1 out of 33 men and 15% of children. And that is just the reported stuff.  I have seen so much sexual assault in my life that I am probably more biased than I should be for a twenty three year old but I cannot convey to you how horrible sexual assault is. I have known friends who were assaulted by their dads or uncles or grandfathers for nine years or kids who are still in grade school and don’t know that what is happening is even wrong! Sometimes it takes years and years of therapy to help cope with it and even then, sometimes there are still times of panic or trouble with getting intimate with their partners.

There are others like myself who were going on a walk or run and it randomly happened to us out of the blue. Your whole life changes. I don’t particularly think of myself as a rape victim just because I was worried about other things like saving my own life so my mom wouldn’t be devastated. I am the exception to the normal though. Again, so much therapy and so many trust issues. Depression, anxiety and feeling worthless and violated all comes with it.

When people don’t think before they use the term ‘rape’ I get upset. It has been very disturbing to me lately how often its used. It is a very serious issue that thousands have gone through. We live in the age where cyber bullying and ‘pushing the social envelope’ is normal and younger generations have a thing for wanting to be radical and extreme. These same people feel bigger and braver from behind a screen and don’t see people on the internet as real human beings sometimes. Stop using the term. Find something more intelligent and think before you type and try to comprehend that what you say affects other people.

And on my last note here, if you are currently or ever become a victim of sexual assault (although I pray you don’t,) PLEASE GET HELP. PLEASE CALL LAW ENFORCEMENT. I cannot express this enough. I don’t care if it is a family member or a significant other. Leave their sorry ass and hightail it out of there. You do not deserve that. You are a beautiful and wonderful person and you have the right to say what happens to you. Don’t worry about it being messy with the family for holidays and birthdays. It will all work out in the end. It will suck for a while. Trust me. What you need to focus on is keeping yourself (and any children you may have) safe. If it is a random stranger, get a good description. I know it will be/was hard to concentrate when adrenaline kicks in and your life is in danger but try your best. Don’t shower after. Go straight to the police. They will have resources to help you. It is not your fault.

Please report. I know it’s hard but if it doesn’t get reported, it could happen again to someone else. The more you speak up the less they get away with! We need to help each other out! We are all here together so we might as well try to make the world better.

Sorry the post was a little rant-y and very long but I just felt really passionate about it. I hope whoever needed to hear this did. I am a little nervous about the comments on this one. Others may choose to post personal stories and I don’t want comments that are mean or put people down. Also know that internet trolls will be deleted and reported.

 

Love, Mika.

Goodbye.

Recently, I've been going through some stuff and lately I have been missing my old self. You could call it, 'Pre brush with death Mika.' As you know, I struggle with my new face sometimes. And that is totally fine as long as I don't dwell on it but there are days where I feel like I have lost an old friend. One that was there all during my childhood and adolescent years and helped me shape myself. In a way, when I was murdered, she died too and left me to rediscover myself. Trials and hardships are difficult. Obviously. They test you in such a way that sometimes, you change yourself so you can adapt and survive. I feel like not only has my appearance changed, but my personality as well. Most days, I feel like a crotchety 80 year old woman who brandishes her cane at 'young hoodlums' and mutters, "I'm too old for this sh*t" and "Back in my day, we were spanked and not rewarded if we were being disobedient!" and definitely, "I've paid my dues!" I have seen so much in my tiny life that if I were to die tomorrow, I'd almost be relieved. Its a hard life man!

 

I do sit and wonder sometimes how life would have turned out if I hadn't walked down that river trail. What would I be doing? Who would I be? I don't usually mind the new Mika. She is a little more emotional than the old one and slightly more difficult but all in all she gets the job done and is overall a good person. It has been over four years and I'm still getting used to the change.

 

I'm not very sure about where I wanted to go with this post. I think this is more of a 'what Mika feels' post instead of a tutorial or a 'real life talk.' And it is my blog so I can totally do that. There is a very good chance that this post is just for me. Hopefully someone somewhere will find something that relates to them here.  Who knows, maybe I'm just insane. Either way, if you feel like this know that there is hope and things will get better. You will figure out how to love yourself again.

Build Your Puzzle, Love the Picture

Hello everyone! You may or may not remember me, I'm the mysterious Kaeli that disappeared from the blog for two years. But, I'm back and at least some what adjusted to life outside of the Arizona Tempe Mission. I must admit, I'm glad to have my skinny jeans and a car rather than my bike and skirts everyday. And the fact that I will probably NEVER see 122 degrees outside in Utah is also a relief. But I do miss the people, the sunsets and the fact that I spent all my time helping other people and not having to worry about myself. Mostly. I definitely haven't completely killed the selfish and pride bugs yet.

Anyways, coming home after 18 months was different than I expected it to be. Somewhat to my surprise, Cedar City is still the same little town it use to be, and yet as much as it felt like everything was the same, things are different too. I am different, my friends are different and even the Shaved Ice stands are different! ;) At first the excitement of being home and seeing everyone and everything again made things easy. But eventually reality hit and I knew I had to start moving on with my life. But how? I came home in the middle of the semester and so many of my friends were married or moved away or had kind of moved on with their lives. I found that I had come home a different shaped puzzle piece than I had left, and the other puzzle pieces had all changed too. But here I was trying to put myself back in the same place, kind of like when you try to force the wrong piece somewhere where it doesn't quite fit.

I found it a lot easier to try be around people I already knew, but I expected those relationships to be the same as they use to. But the fact is that they just couldn't be, because even though we're all the same people still, time and experiences had slowly brought about subtle differences that meant things would never really be the same. This wasn't a bad thing, but it scared me. I got a job, to keep myself busy but I wasn't getting enough hours, so I found a second job. Still, so much seemed to be missing from my life. So I sunk into a routine. I would work, hang out with one of my old friends and when I was alone I would text another old friend. After having had a constant companion for 18 months I got very bored with being alone.  Talking with these two friends felt like I was filling some of the void, but at the end of the day no matter what I did, or how packed my schedule was, I felt like I had accomplished nothing. My friends didn't understand what was upsetting me and rather than being understanding and supportive they started to tell me I was too different or that there was something wrong with me. And to some degree those things were true, I had changed and I was struggling with the adjustment in ways that even I didn't really understand. I just knew that I hated being alone and what I wanted more than anything was to pack up and go back to my mission, where I didn't have to worry about my own life.

What I eventually came to realize was that, I had tried to put myself back into situations that were comfortable, but I wasn't happy. Whether or not my friends were treating me well wasn't so much the issue as the fact that I wasn't progressing the way that I wanted to. It wasn't that my friends were bad people, or that we didn't like or care about each other anymore, but many of my goals and perspectives had changed or become more definite. I needed to be around people who shared those same goals and who could support me in reaching them. I've never been good at letting go of people in my life. But I finally realized it didn't mean that I didn't love them or want them in my life anymore, it just meant that things had changed, and if I wanted to move forward I needed to accept that. I couldn't be angry at myself or feel like a bad person for moving on, I just had to accept that it was time and it was best for everyone. It was hard. It still is. I miss those people, and I want them in my life but right now is time to start putting all the pieces together in a way that they fit again, after all the change. There will be new pieces and old pieces and moved pieces and maybe there will be a few pieces that have to be thrown away. But it's going to be okay, because eventually that beautiful picture will be visible.

My point in all this is that you build your puzzle, and if the pieces aren't fitting, you can't force them. It isn't a bad thing, it just means things are changing and there can be no progress without that change. Don't waste your time trying to force your piece back into relationships that don't fit, it only hurts. It doesn't mean you have to throw the pieces away, but maybe it's time to rearrange the puzzle. You will do the most good in the place where you fit, and where you can continue to build and grow. Love yourself, trust yourself and remember to step back and enjoy the beautiful picture you are making.
-Kaeli

Refashionista Mika!

I work at a bank in a Walmart. Working at Walmart has made my wallet a whooooooole lot lighter and sadder. But when everything is so cheap, how can I resist?? So I bought this great WALMART DRESS ( <-----Buy me here!) for $15. Like I predicted, it was way too short! So I had this awesome idea. Why don't I chop it off and make it knee length!? Wonderful. Idea. Mika. High five! But what to do with the extra? Huh why not make an infinity scarf? Its already sewn into a circle so I literally had to throw it on my neck and go for it.  AND it turned out so much better than I anticipated.

Results below!

 

 

Did I mention it is super comfy? Yeah. Its basically my new favorite dress. Try it! It takes three minutes to do. I'm serious.

 

Love, Mika. 

Mermaid-y Ish?

 

Well here I am. I got new brushes and this what went down! I bought Pueen brushes from Amazon for about $20. I love them! They really hold color well and blend beautifully.

My makeup is from:
Eye shadow- Icing
Black eyeliner- Buxom
Teal liner- Urban Decay
Mascara- 3D Fiber lashes

I put the teal liner all over my lash line and on the outside of my crease in a giant "V" shape. Blend. A lot.... And then layer with eye shadow. Apply a darker shadow to the crease and blend some more!

Hopefully I will remember to take pictures when I play around with the other liners and shadows. :)

Love, Mika.

Shadowed Liner.

 

 

Today I was extremely tired and decided to not use effort for my makeup. So, I remembered a thing I saw on What Not To Wear (and most likely from Pinterest too) about using an angled brush to line your eyes. This technique is usually involves gel liner but I used a black eye shadow instead. Using shadow makes it a softer look.

 

Let me tell you about my brush. It is a paint brush! I bought it at Joann's for a buck. Best deal ever. And it works like a charm! I definitely recommend them. I originally bought it to fill in my brows but as you can see by my pics, it doesn't get used often. But all I did was dip it in my matte black shadow and swiped it across the top of my lashes on my eyelid. I was SHOCKED by how easy and fast it was. It went on so smooth and perfect the first time. I had so much control! And the winged bit at the end? I got it on the FIRST TRY. What?? It was beautiful and it looked like I was wearing liner! I wasn't sure how well it would stay put but it was great all day. To take my pictures, I redid it just to make sure you can see it. But this time, I dipped my brush into some water and then placed it in the eye shadow. It was much darker and more defined. I recommend this for a more dramatic or clean look. Do the dry shadow technique for a softer/more romantic/smudgy/natural look. 

 

As a side note, I use this palette (below) almost every day. I bought it from Costco! I loooooove Costco. Seriously I recommend it. It was a pretty good price too. I used Raven for the liner and the Woodrose for the brown on my lid.

Let me know what you think! Follow me on Instagram (kermitfacefredrick) or Facebook or Pinterest! I would love to see you! :)

Love, Mika.

Cause The World Is Ugly, But You're Beautiful To Me.

Certain events in my life are currently creating chaos and heartache which is actually quite normal for me. I feel like I am always having to go through something difficult. The day that my life is easy, will be the day that I am cold in my grave. But even then I almost guarantee that my funeral will be a disaster.

 

That being said, I chose this life. I volunteered for this. I decided before I was born that I wanted a hard life Why would I do that?? Well God knew I could handle it. I realize this sounds arrogant but I promise, I'm not bragging. The other night, I was sobbing on my bathroom floor, (don't ask why I was randomly on my bathroom floor because I haven't a clue.) I was so overwhelmed with life that all I could do was cry for an hour. When I finally had motivation to get back into bed, I decided to pray. Mind you, I don't usually pray. But I felt very inclined to. So I started. I told God that I was thankful for the trials he was giving me because I knew that they would help me become a better and stronger person. At this point, tears started pouring down my face again because I knew with my entire heart that I really and honestly was so grateful to have the opportunities that I was receiving, even though it meant terrible circumstances. It reminds me of what Ron Weasley said in the third book when he is trying to predict Harry's future in Divination, "Right, you've got a sort of wonky cross… That means you're going to have 'trials and suffering'—sorry about that—but there's a thing that could be the sun … hang on … that means 'great happiness' … so you're going to suffer but be very happy about it..." Its like JK Rowling knew my life. I wouldn't trade my trials for anything. I complain more than I should about them but truth is, I need them so I can become a better person and help others.

I have sat back and watched awful things happen to my friends and family these past couple of months. Cancer, suicide, drugs, discovering you entire life is a lie, it all happens for a reason. ALL of it. And yes, it does suck a big one but guess what? You CAN do it. You ARE strong. You ARE capable of coping with your trial. You WILL be ok. I have seen you all struggle and deal with horror admirably and such courage that it brings tears into my eyes and hope into my heart. Because in the end, good will prevail over evil. Centuries of conflict and tribulation has taught me that no matter how grim and bleak the situation looks, there will always be good. 

 

Those who know me, I have a great passion for Harry Potter. (Obviously because I have already quoted it multiple times. It has gotten me through the worst times of my life. I even listened to it in the hospital when I was recovering from my attack. It brings me to tears because JK Rowling speaks directly to my heart. And I know that Harry Potter is a children's book, but it has amazing lessons. I am going to share a few Albus Dumbledore quotes because he is a wise man. Imaginary, but genius. He said, “It is important to fight and fight again, and keep fighting, for only then can evil be kept at bay though never quite eradicated.” Evil will never cease. NEVER. The devil's only purpose for the rest of eternity is to bring everyone down and destroy the world. But we can't give in. We must keep going. We can not let wickedness take over. I can't even give you a good reason why good must be victorious, I just feel compelled to be the good the world needs. We must go through tough times because that is life. Please, don't give up. 

 

Professor Dumbledore also said, “It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." He is right. Our attitude and how we handle situations is what really counts. I know it is hard to be happy and positive when life is going down hill real fast, but I assure you that it helps with coping and healing. We could choose to be miserable but when has that ever helped anyone? I am not saying that you can't be sad about whatever happened, but just don't solely dwell on your misfortunes and losses. Trials are good for us even if they are sucky and awful and makes us want to punch things in the face. What makes us great is resisting the urges to stoop to a lower level and rising against our hardships with grace and (excuse the language but it is the perfect word for it) badassery.

 

Now for one of the most popular HP quotes, “Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.” Goodness can only be found if you look for it. There are times where all you want to do is wither away to nothing because you are so devastated and you don't want to do anything. And I have personally wondered, "Why is this happening? Why does God hate me??" But there are always multiple things I can learn from whatever is going on but I do have to put forth an effort to see what it is. God is there. He will always help you. He does not give us anything we can not handle. He gives us difficult times so that we can grow and be amazing. You are not alone.

 

 

Sorry being all over the place and about all the Potter quotes. I'm also sorry for all the religion talk. Actually no, I'm sorry not sorry about either. I like what I like! I want you all to know that I love each and every one of you. Even if I have never met you. And for the record, I am rooting for all of you to be happy and healthy and live a wonderful life. You deserve it.

 

Love, Mika.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These Shoes Are Made For Walking.

Apparently it has been a few months since I posted... Oops. My apologies! This year for Christmas presents, I decided to make shoes for all the girls at work! They (and by they, I mean all of us,) have a slight obsession with shoes and lucky for them, I redo shoes! So here are their shoes.

These are Tauni's shoes. Tauni is a cowgirl to the max so I did a version of the very popular trend Burlap and Lace. She is preggar's so she can't quite them yet but the wedge style is great for beginning heel walkers. (;

These are JayLynn's shoes. (My last post was on her.) Her taste is very similar to mine so I had no problem working on these wedges. They have leopard print and lace with pink tulle laced up the side.

These are Brenda's shoes. I made her's with plum ruffles and hounds tooth print. Plus, the mary jane style is easy to walk in.  

These are Janette's shoes. She always wears a cute polka dot shirt to work and so I did these so I could match her shirt. They are peep toe and who can resist bows?

These are Lillian's shoes. She is a little lady not even reaching 5 feet tall so finding shoes in her size was a little ridiculous. But I did like the metallic embellish and how they turned out. :)

 



 

Okie dokie! That is that! Starting in January, I will be charging for shoes. I do a case by case basis price wise but I can tell you that if you already have a pair of shoes that you want redone, then it will be cheaper! If you want me to do shoes for a wedding or a school dance or a random special occasion, email me! mikafredrick@yahoo.com I can quote you a price depending on what you want done. And I can usually have them done in a week. :)

 

Love, Mika. 

 

 

 

 

Hey Sexy Girlfriend! JayLynn Cooke.

So this beautiful woman is my friend and Assistant Manager over me at the bank. I can not even begin to tell you how amazing she is. She is so strong and a wonderful friend. Plus, her obsession with shoes may exceed my own so we get along beautifully.

 

I got a text from JayLynn on my day off. The gist of the text was basically, "Hey I look hot. You need to come see my outfit!" And I replied with, "Obviously." Because let's face it, she is so cute all the freaking time! I went in to the bank and almost fell over. She said she looked hot but holy hot mama Batman. I immediately told her I had to have a picture to blog about. The outfit is adorable and so versatile! You can wear this EVERYWHERE. Store, work, date night, church, family pictures, your living room... possibilities are endless.

 

First off, she is mixing prints and rocking it. The skirt is obviously striped. It is in black and white which makes mixing waaay easier. You can't really tell but the shoes are a blue and black leopard print. They are also 6 inches but shockingly comfortable and easy to walk in. Leopard and stripes are both considered "neutrals" in the fashion world so work them together! The skirt is amazing. It is tight enough to show off curves and flatter but loose enough to be lady like. It also hits below the knee so you can totally wear sky high heels with it and still be appropriate and classy and hot and feminine all at the same time.

 

This shirt is... incredible! I want one!  You can wear it multiple ways which is a nice way to get more bang for your buck. (Wait... is that phrase in reference to prostitutes?? Who came up with that saying?? Let's pretend it is about fireworks! .......) Back to JayLynn! The detail on her shirt dresses up the entire outfit and creates a great focal point. And it gives great shape!

 

And let's address her hair. This is some of the most kick a hair ever. Seriously! She is rocking the short hair. This is grown out a bit from a Mohawk and doing it very gracefully. It makes me want to chop all my hair off every time I see it. She has texture up in there to add a bit of spice and to change it up enough so she doesn't get bored.

 

Conclusion: Jaylynn is fabulous and I am very grateful for her in my life. I absolutely love her and I am so happy to be getting her to know her better. And spoiler! We are going to be going into business together! More on that to come shortly!

 

Love, Mika.

 

 

 

Winged Shadow.

This is my finished product! It is a great date look. I wore this to work but if you aren't that brave, save it for night time. :)

 

So today I tried a new makeup technique. I have known about it for a while but I haven't really tried it. It is winged eye shadow! Whoop whoop. And guess what I discovered? It is AMAZING. And it takes 1/100th of the skill that winged liner takes. Score. So let me tell you the steps to the perfect winged shadow!

 

1. Apply black (or a dark color, I am wearing a matte black color in these photos) all over your lid. I made mine a little lighter in the middle and darker toward the crease.

 

2. Apply more black in the crease of your eye. Extend the black by dragging the outside half of the shadow from the crease up to the end of your eyebrow. Blend.

 

3. Now take a baby or facial wipe and make a diagonal swipe from the corner of your eye to the end of the eyebrow. I like to use my fingernail to make the wipe have a sharper edge. See the sharp edge?

 

***Note: Another method is to use tape to make the sharp winged edge. Tape off the edge with Scotch or masking tape and apply shadow. You can also hold a business card or piece of paper up while you apply your eye shadow for a neat edge.   

 

4. I then rimmed my waterlines with a black pencil. I then used a purple pencil on the bottom underneath my waterline/ lower lashes and smudged it. I would encourage you to use a bright color on bottom because it definitely steps up the fun factor.

 

5. Pile on mascara! Because mascara rocks and every girl should utilize this amazing beauty tool. :) And I usually don't wear mascara on the bottom lashes, but I did today and I am in love! My eyes looked so big.  

Ta Da! Done. My camera is terrible so you can't see the purple very nicely but I promise its there! 

 

Try this look and tell me how it goes! I want to hear. Also, if you don't use baby wipes, you need to. NEED. They are magic! They are super cheap and super effective. Plus, it is a lazy girl trick. Throw some on/in your night stand and you don't even need to get out of bed to take off your makeup. Because lets face it, ain't no body got time or energy to go to the sink.

Love, Mika.



It's A Boy!

Today, I will address men's fashion. Dun dun dun! The handsome young man to the left is my husband Kyle. And he is looking pretty darn snazzy in his getup if I do say so myself. :) Kyle's inner Doctor Who definitely came out on this one and he worked it.

 

Kyle's outfit works on many levels. Church, teaching, any event where should be a little dressed up, presentations, ect. (He wore this to church.) He is mixing brown and grey which is looked down upon by most people but it is totally working here. Neutrals are being mixed and he added a pop of color with his dark denim colored/navy/royal blue shirt. And for a dash of cool, a bowtie. Bowties are cool.

The key to looking put together is fit. If your clothes don't fit, you will not look good (that applies to both women and men's fashion.)

 

Love, Mika.

 

Wash Your Face Sonny.

So when I was working at the Tavelodge, I would watch a lot of TV because, well, we had TV and lots of time. I would see a Proactiv commercial literally every three commercials. It was ridiculous. Then I finally broke down and ordered some out of sheer boredom and irritation. So these are my results!

I really love it. I saw results in one week! I feel like my skin is softer and smoother and the coloring on my face is becoming more even and less patchy and red. I also got the Blackhead Dissolver Gel. I can't see a major difference with it but I am hoping after a while that it will start working a little better. All in all, I highly recommend this product. I only use it once a day or every other day but I still see results.

 

What do you do for your facial routine? I wanna know!

 

Love,

 

Mika.

Dear Mothers and Future Mothers.

Dear Mothers and Future Mothers,

This letter is to all past, present or future moms or anyone who interacts with children on a regular basis. As many of you know, kids are extremely impressionable. They pick up on EVERYTHING. That swear word you just said? Heard it and repeated. The candy bar you snuck in before dinner? Saw it and tried it the next night (and probably got in trouble.) Now, these are all very obvious things. But what is not so obvious is what you say without thinking. I'm talking about body image comments.

 

We all do it. We all say things like, "I wish I was taller!" or "I used to have a nice figure like hers when I was young. Now I'm just gross and fat." Kids pick up on these! How are we supposed to teach them good body image when we say derogatory towards ourselves? It doesn't matter if you say it half jokingly either because children can't usually tell between sarcasm and what is a legitimate sentence. For example, when you say you are fat, your little girl is going to grow up thinking that your body is the standard for being "fat." Chances are, she will have your body type and then think, "Well, if mom is fat, I must be too." And if you are thinking that you are safe because you have all boys, think again. They are going to grow up and they may think that their girlfriends/significant other is fat/unattractive or whatever. This is not ok. Kids are programmed to love how their mother looks. They KNOW from a young age that they have the most beautiful mother on the planet. Don't change that outlook.

 

Ladies, we need to stop saying mean things about ourselves. Your little girls look up to you. Media only plays a miniscule part on molding their perception of beauty compared to you. You are their role models. Let me rephrase that so you all understand completely. YOU ARE THEIR ROLE MODELS. You. Must. Stop. If you have a hard time stopping, make a goal that you won't say it in front of the kids. Baby steps! Once you have mastered that, stop completely. Changing the way we all perceive ourselves starts with us.  None of us want our children to grow up thinking that they aren't enough. It is not fair to them. Please, please, please think about it.

 

Plus, the less mean you are to yourself, the happier you will be and the better mom, wife, friend, sister, ect you will become. And while I am on the subject, moms: Please take care of yourselves. I watch What Not to Wear every chance I get. I love both the physical and the mental transformations that happen. Don't let yourselves go. I always feel a million times better on my bad/sad/gross days if I get ready, even if it is just a little mascara and a clean outfit. I promise you will have more energy and feel like you are the most awesome person alive (which, let's face it, you are! Work it.) You are amazing creatures and you do so much for your family and friends so start treating yourselves like you deserve. You wouldn't send your kids out looking like a hot mess so you shouldn't either!      

I'm just saying. I really do know what I am talking about and I don't mean to sound like I am lecturing but I just want you all to be the best you can be because you are incredible and I am grateful to you.

So the challenge this month is:
- Stop belittling yourselves.
- Take a few minutes for yourselves each day.

I swear to you that this will enrich and improve your lives greatly.

Tons of love,

Mika.

Fantasy Meets Reality.

I would have chose eternal slumber over this. Of course, eternal slumber sounds amazing compared to four hours of sleep every night!

 

I was scrolling through good ol' Facebook when I came across an article. The article was about princesses who are stuck in reality. What? I wasn't too sure on what it meant so I clicked on it, read the article and looked through the pictures. I was flabbergasted. I love it! You must take a peek by clicking HERE. Let me know what you think! I would love to reenact this in a shoot. I think this would be so fun!

 

Also remember to like us on Facebook! Or you can comment on here. :)

 

Love, Mika

Ouch.

Life has been... hectic. I quit the center so I have been job hunting like mad. Kyle and I landed managing a hotel and surprise! We hate it. So we put in our two weeks notice and I have been freaking out trying to find a job! Unemployment is not a good look on me. I get stir crazy and spend money I don't have to feel better. Bad Mika! But this hotel business is not a good look on me either. Kyle and I wait up until all hours of the night waiting for people to check in and then get up at 6:30 to put out breakfast. Talk about stressful. Either way, I was still applying everywhere and hoping. SUU called me for an interview and then called me twice to tell me that I didn't get it. Thanks SUU. Just reject me twice! Not like I had feelings. :P

 

And just when I thought there was no hope, I got a call from State Bank and I am now a part time teller! I am so excited! I get to sit down, not wake up at 6:30 and I get to dress up every day! No more tank top/cardigan/jeans/dirty socks combo. So keep an eye out for new outfits to come! I probably wont post every day but I will be doing more posts than once a month. Again, I apologize for that! But when I am not checking people in, I am taking a nap or cleaning. Please send me outfits that you have put together! I have a new email mikafredrick@yahoo.com :)

 

Love, Mika.

 

Reverse Discrimination.

These are my eyes. The one on the left (my right eye) has permanent damage so my pupil doesn't quite dilate properly. I am not 100% sure why I chose this photo to represent this post. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that my eyes are different sizes and that could possibly represent different perceptions. Maybe I just think of the saying, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." Maybe it makes sense in my head at 3am and I am just going with it so you should too eh.

I wasn't really sure how I wanted to word today's post. I feel like I came off a little conceited in some parts but I promise you, I did not mean any of it in a boastful way. I am merely trying to make a point about being nice to people. Also, I am not targeting anyone specific in my post so if you think I am talking about you, I probably am not. It is just thoughts about the general public. So without further ado, my post.

I won't sugar coat it, I really lucked out on my body. I have a Barbie body. I have a 36-24-36 on a 5'11 frame. However, it can be both a curse and a blessing. Before you start jumping down my throat about how it could never be a curse, I will explain. People with the 'ideal' bodies are often treated poorly. Yes, some special treatment is received occasionally by strangers but a lot of the times, people hate on you! And not just any old people. It is usually friends or coworkers or even family who does the hating. I am not that girl who just thinks that everyone is jealous of me. To this day, I still think people don't notice me or remember me because I just don't think I am that awesome to be gawked at.
(Again, sounding a little full of myself but please continue reading!)

I can't tell you how many times I have been told, "Man, I hate you! Who looks like that??" or "Eat something! You can't be full after three baby carrots." I have even had girls tell me that they didn't want to hang out with me because of the way I looked. What?? I wish I were making this up. Its a lonely life when girls tell you they hate you all the time/avoid hanging out with you because of how you look. It is just plain ol' mean. I would NEVER tell anyone that I didn't want to hang out with them because they weren't a size 0. If I did that, people would think I was the biggest b*tch in the whole world. But when it is reversed, it is sociably acceptable. It makes no sense at all. Why should anyone be allowed to criticize someone for the way they are built? I can't change my body type. I can't control how much food fills me up. My stomach shrank considerably in the hospital because my jaw was wired shut and then wouldn't open past three millimeters for six months.

There are days were I feel like crap because of some of the remarks I hear. I am pretty good at shaking it off but some days I just get super self conscience about it or I go home and want to cry. These things are hurtful even if you don't mean them that way. My father in law always stands up for me when people start commenting and I appreciate it a ton because I am too chicken to say anything. 

I am not saying I don't do that too. I look at girls and think, "Ugh. She has the cutest butt. I want that butt." And then I mentally covet their body for the entire time they are in my sight. So I hate on people too. But here is the thing. Hating on people is fine! It is ok! As long as you keep your mouth shut. Compliment them instead of saying hurtful things. When I am feeling catty and start hating on others, I have to take a step back and find out why I am unhappy and how I can change that. We attack others because of our own insecurities. Also, I find that complimenting others (as often as is not creepy) helps me feel better about me. And bonus because they go home feeling good about themselves instead of depressed over being bullied. We need to start changing the way we interact with each other because life is hard enough without all the negativity. We don't know other people's internal monologue is telling themselves so what may be a tiny, innocent comment could be the straw that broke the camel's back.

I challenge you to compliment and praise instead of harassing/making snide comments. Then report to me! I guarantee that you will feel better about yourself and you will be happier in life overall.

Love, Mika.

Day 35 and 36.

 

My hair is finally back to my favorite red velvet cake color! I forgot how much I loved this color. If you are looking for a new summer color, this one is it. It works on every skin tone every created and its so fun! Plus, red heads are always in. My outfit consists of a stretchy black v neck with a purple tank and a ruffled teal skirt. I love this skirt so much! Probably because of the ruffles... it just feels so flirty and makes me want to spin. Fortunately, in this pic you can't see the layer of pancake batter spilled down the front of it. I was only eight minutes into my shift when I whisked the batter too vigorously, causing it to seek revenge. I paired it was polka dotted heels! 

 

This look I wore to work too. Ignore my awesome background. My room is so tiny that is is very cluttered even when it is clean so I do my best. It also has awful lighting. Normally I would not pair this skirt with a shirt that matched my hair but I was running super late this morning and decided it would go better with it than an orange shirt. I would usually pair this skirt with one of my twenty teal shirts but I wanted to stay away from my high school colors today even though it is a really awesome combo. I also paired these with black velvet pumps. I didn't show them today because you can imagine them and they are really plain, black shoes. I found this skirt at Urban Outfitters! It also comes in a rosy color. Very pretty! 

Love, Mika.

Day 34... And Vanishing.

I wore this number today! It was really hot today and I didn't have to go into work. So today Zachary and I went to Groovefest! Groovefest is a festival held in Cedar City every summer where smaller bands from all over come and play on an outdoor stage in the park. We had lots of fun. This dress is covered in metal dots. Just an FYI, metalic details are so in. Especially on shoes. studs, metal plating, you name it, it is huge.

And in other news, I discovered a product in the hair world that is basically the greatest thing since conditioner. It is called vanisher. It lifts all the color from your hair without damaging it way bad like bleach does. It is a little more expensive but TOTALLY worth it. You do look like a slight ginger for a bit but its not carrot orange so that is nice. Try it next time you go from dark to light! I did it because I was going from a black back to my red velvet color and I sure missed it.

Love, Mika.

Day 33.

Once in a while, I have wonderful inspiration from the fashion gods. Today was one of those days. I love this outfit so much. At first, I was going to just wear a black tank with my blazer but then a little voice in the back of my head was like, "Nah, it might be hot at work so just wear a v neck so you can take off the blazer if it does." Well, my inner voice knew what it was talking about. I got to work and was informed the AC was broken! I could have died. It was 82 degrees and I was going insane trying to cool down. I finally had to put frozen vegetables on the back of my neck so i could cool down enough to function. 

You can't see, but my shoes are my blue suede ones that I was looking everywhere for for two years. (And just for the record, when I was shopping I saw tons and tons of blue suede heels. I am kind of bitter that NOW they come back. Why couldn't it have been years ago??) 

I am going to tell you again how much I love maxi skirts. They are just as comfortable (if not more) than pajama pants. Try them! I promise they are so worth it. They are light and airy and made of a wonderful stretchy material. Think of your yoga pants or your leggings. Now think of them dressy and cute but still insanely comfortable. Ta Da! Maxi skirts. I am sure maxi dresses would be exactly the same. I have never owned one of those though due to my ridiculous height. They don't make them long enough for me to wear heels with! And if I can't wear heels with it, then I won't get it. If anyone does know where to get one, let me know! 

Like always, love, Mika.

Day 31 and 32.

I almost repeated an outfit yesterday. Almost. It really was a close call. I was had a really bad night and it had carried on to the next morning. Kyle and I both had the day off and decided to go to St. George to shop (see last post.) Getting dressed took me like an hour. I wanted to wear something cool but I also wanted to wear heels just in case I found a dress... and my feet hurt when I walk around in flats. I know, I am insane but I have high arches and heels just feel better! Back to my point, I was struggling with my outfit. I finally decided on black jeans and heels with a black, floral shirt. Kyle then shot me down telling me it would be "too hot." Being in an emotional state, I was not happy. So I changed. Again. And threw a fit. I then threw on this:
 

 Not too shabby. I got to wear heels and a skirt. Plus the white shirt was way cooler than the black shirt. I quite like how it turned out but I am sad I didn't get a picture of it on.

Today, I wore my new DI skirt with a red shirt and wedges. I love this skirt! I am not too crazy about the color or the pattern but I love the style. It is flowy and it is twirl-tastic. I had a reddish brown eye shadow on my top lid with eyeliner on my upper waterline and mega lashes. I did not apply any makeup to my lower lid. I decided to change it up a bit. I also had red lipstick on earlier but it rubbed off on my Loaded Potato Grillers from Taco Bell. If you have not had one, get one. It is cheesy, bacon-y, potato-y (like fries) deliciousness wrapped in a tortilla and grilled. Get one. Best creation (besides their nacho cheese Dorito Locos Tacos.)

Love, Mika.